Tryptophantastic: ThanksKilling (2009)
My dear readers, while my days are happily filled with viewings of on-screen decapitation, vivisection, asphyxiation and of course, exsanguination, the truth is I have found myself a little less exuberant when presented with similar scenarios in real life. Sadly, this want of a strong stomach leaves me less-than-adept when certain holidays emerge. I recall quite vividly in my youth how the men of my family were expected to dispatch the fowl before the Thanksgiving repast and when I finally came of age, I instead named him Henry Hearthfellow and provided him with a backstory involving abusive foster parents and a lost twin brother. Father was not at all pleased with my actions and the silent feast that followed brought a sullen end to the adventures of young Henry.
ThanksKilling seamlessly transitions from pilgrim days to the present
Featherstone, a Native American shaman, is also a man familiar with unconventional turkey preparations. Many years ago, he bore some measure of disrespect from a pilgrim with slight regard for decorum. To express his dissatisfaction, Featherstone decided to use his powers of necromancy to turn an ordinary turkey into an instrument of death and low-brow jests. This magical Meleagris gallopavo is called Turkie (Jordan Downey) and he is tasked with killing off any Caucasians he may encounter.
White genocide is apparently an exhausting endeavor and Turkie prefers to rest for a period of 505 years between homicidal sprees. The beginning of one such cycle happens to coincide with a group of college students heading off on their Thanksgiving break. Though Turkie’s murderous mandate is meant to apply to all people of European ancestry, Turkie decides to make this upbeat collegiate crew his primary target. Fortunately for our felonious fowl, the collective powers of observation among his would-be victims are rather low and at times he is able to walk among them undetected by wearing human faces like masks or employing a pair of “gag” glasses.
Turkie is only able to convince the heroine that her father still lives through a devilishly clever disguise
Aside from being a strangely gluttonous acknowledgement of the brief cordiality that existed between Native Americans and Europeans, Thanksgiving is a time of humble reflection, a moment to ponder the various blessings scattered about our lives. It is a worthy exercise, to be sure, but one that most undertake without the proper state of mind, as it seems frightfully easy to take for granted things for which we are actually quite thankful. How, then, are we to know what we are most grateful for without first being deprived?
In a slim 70 minutes, a fraction of the time consumed by some supposedly more thoughtful endeavors, ThanksKilling manages to put the viewer in a state of deep meditation. By presenting a feature bereft of wit, coherence, proper funding and professional performers, it challenges the very basic premises of our cinematic viewing and forces the audience to confront the possibility that the very simplest of things are worthy of our greatest respect. I, for one, am profoundly grateful not just for all the aforementioned qualities, but for a film that reminds me so strikingly of their import.
ThanksKilling runs 70 minutes and does not possess a certified rating in the United States.
